I don't understand.

It's Saturday, my RD and I'm at home. Why? Why am I here? Why am I still awake? I should be sleeping by now. And I'm very much tempted to sleep already.. and to wake up tomorrow evening! Eat dinner and then, will just sleep again `til it's Monday already and I just need to go to work.

*sigh*

I just want this weekend to END.

DATE: Bowling and Church-hopping

Manila Cathedral

Churches are structures who are being given a lot of effort and design.. architecturally (if there is such a word). It's very seldom that you'll see an ugly church because of course, that's a place of worship. I wanna go to a lot of known church here in Manila and in the province! I'm actually planning to a create an album once R and I started to go around the churches! Maybe we'll start on Holy Week.. if ever that there won't be any change of plans. :)

As for bowling, last night, since my shift was 10pm-10am (oh yeah, 12-hour shift!), I was dashing to Greenhills by 930pm and was caught in the traffic around Rob Galleria. Then, I saw it on neon lightnings, "PAENG SKY BOWL". Oh, another first! I WANT ANOTHER FIRST!! I wanna try bowling.. with him! We're thinking of inviting friends for this since we both don't know how to play the game. I can imagine how happy it can be once we're teasing each other on how we score with bowling. That'll be fun! Another date to look forward! =D

And hey, our Fun Run date will finally happen already on Sunday! Weeeeeee! I'll update you about it ASAP! ;)

Abused.

"O, parang lagi ka na lang late nakakauwi ah. Di ka na nakakaalis ng 10am sa office niyo."

That was what my boyfriend said.. or to that effect awhile ago once I called him on my phone. I ended up staying at the office until 12nn and due to me trying to finish everything's on my hand.

As a lot of people do know about me at work, I'm currently during a Real Time Analyst (RTA) and a Coach task. I'm a certified RTA, yes. But I'm not yet a certified coach. As much as everyone wanted me to be a coach already, and of course I wanted it as well, I'm not yet certified. Actually, I'm not even a trainee. I'm still waiting for my Behavioral Interview.. and I'm not ready about that one, too. Good thing, it's not yet being scheduled but they said that they want me to rush about it already. =s

I wanna be a coach. I almost perfected my RTA job already that they do rely on me when it comes to that part of my job even though I have my partner.. because as arrogant as I may sound, even if my partner will resign, the production won't stop because I'm there. But if I'll resign, or will be out for a long time, they will be in a chaos. Hehehe! Actually, it happened already. That's why my boss was asking me before on when will I be back because they need me.. oha. ;)

Going back..

I'm getting tired already. I'm fine with doing everything that I can. They can give me a lot of things to do and I can still manage. But I can't go on like this. If I'm the coach, fine with me. Even though there's a lot of things on a shoulder of a coach, I'll do it -- as long as you pay me as you pay a coach. If not, let me just go back to being full time RTA. At least, I know what I'm expected to do and I'm able to help out the production even though I don't need to because being an RTA isn't that much as a coach. Sometimes, I really just ask for some job so that I'll have productive time. But with me being with a coach post? Please don't expect everything from me.

I am not always superwoman. I am human.

(But hey, don't get me wrong.. I still love my job. Just give me a job that is equivalent to my pay.)

Vacation Affair

Two brokenhearted person meet abroad and found themselves in love with each other. Quite possible right? Especially if they are both lonely.. but what if persons in there real life will be back to their lives even before vacation ends? Isn't that quite hard?

Hmm.. Now I'm thinking about Bleach. He can always give me shivers in one way or another but no one can beat R's place in my heart. My feelings for him won't be transferred to any other person or won't even be close to that. But before I go deeper into that, let me just share what happened Friday night..

As I leave home for my last day of work last week.. I passed by Bleach and his friends. Actually, I wasn't able to see him and did not dare to look as well. I just know that he was there because his friends were teasing him about me. And then, when I'm already at the corner where cabs passed by, I received a message from him..

"Kumpleto na ulit araw ko kasi nakita kita.. -bleach"

And yes, I admit it, that put a smile on my face. I replied saying,

"Wala ka pala e.. Di mo kayang lumapit sa kin e."

Which he replied with..

"Waaaaa. Mukha kasing nagmamadali ka e. =("

And then I replied,

"Excuses. Sige, work na ko. Good night!"

Actually, those lines weren't the exact lines since I had it deleted already on my phone.

Which made me think that.. is it just coincidence or fate? I don't have his number and I did not save it after he texted me -- which explains why he put his name on the last part of his first text to me. And then, I totally forgot about it before I cleaned up my inbox and sent items last night. I guess it's really not meant to be. This is not really the right time for us.. if ever that we will really have that time.

Going back.. During that time, I can't help myself but to be flattered and smile until I got to work. But I guess, that's just it. After all the butterflies are gone, you'll go back to your real life. Just like what I said at the first paragraph of this entry. At the end of the day, or that so-called vacation, it all boils down to you whether to pursue that "affair" or go back to what you've left before.

For me, I will always go back to R just as like what I've promised. As what I've told my friends at work and to myself, "Minsan, gusto mo lang lumandi to feel that you're still beautiful because other people can still appreciate you and see your physical beauty. But at the end of the day, I will still and always go back to R. That's just it. ^_^" And true to my words, I picked seeing R in the morning, after my shift, and spent my Saturday with him. I may not be that girl that you expect to be faithful with a guy, coz my Mom said I'm like my Dad who's a playboy, but I am loyal.. I only have R in my heart.

Oh.. girls!

Girl: If you caught your girlfriend lying to you, would you break up with her?

Boy: How do you want me to answer?

*girl gave boy a confused look*

Boy: It's hard to understand what a woman really wants.

If I say the wrong thing, you'll be mad at me, them I'm assed out again.

Girl: It's not that difficult.

Have you ever listened to Parn Thanaporn's song?

Boy: Parn Thanaporn?

Girl: I think the lyrics are extremely deep.

It goes.. women don't like watching football

but will watch to be by your side.

We might not know how to wear make-up

but will always push a little brush on for you to see.

*a scene from Hello Stranger ;)