I miss her

What's with the world? Why am I checking out my exes profiles? Hmp! Result? I'm missing her. Actually, I'm bitter about her pamangkin, my very first inaanak. I'm happy with her relationship with Z of course but I just can't help myself thinking that, I was supposed to be that one -- seeing my inaanak grow up as a very gwapo kid. I was supposed to be the one close to him and not Z. But because we drifted away, there goes my chances. Actually, I even have a gift for him. But I don't know on when will I have the chance to give my gift. Maybe this week? Or next week? I don't know. I'll just drop by, for sure.

I just can't help myself to be jealous. I don't want any relationship anymore with her. It's tiring even just about thinking about it. I'm just over and done with her that I already tested it. Haha! Last month, we were supposed to be seeing each other but since I have my anniversary with R, of course I picked R. He's the present and my future. :x I just wanna be friends with her. And I know that we can't bring back what we have before. But at least, I wanna be friends. I wanna see my inaanak again! For sure he won't remember me anymore.. and that makes me real sad. :(

Wish me luck okay? I hope I can have the same relationship with my inaanak. I really really wanna be close to him.. anyway, he's my first! :P