After all the excitement...

... it all went down to me going home this weekend. :( The feeling sucks. After being excited for five days to be with him again on weekends, we only spent seven hours together. As in S-E-V-E-N hours only versus the 120 hours that I am thinking of and waiting for the moment to come to see him again and be with him again. It really sucks. I HATE IT. But I just can't show it awhile ago because.. I was still in the state of shock. Hah!

So yeah, he fetched me from work after my shift and then we went to Quiapo and we bought blue ray discs -- Slumdog Millionaire, Silence of the Lambs, Eagle Eye and one collection of action/thriller movies. After that, ate breakfast at Jollibee then went to their place.

After some cuddling, I was waiting for him to put the cd on so that we can go and start watching the movie but then, surprise! His Tita will be coming to their place. So I was like, so what we'll be doing? He told me we'll just go to the market and we can just stay in Greenwich for I also want to buy Pearl Coolers. So I said it's fine with me as long as he is with me. He told me that he might come home. And I was like, "You're gonna leave me there? I'll just go home if it will be a hassle." But he don't want me to go for it is not yet sure if he needs to show up to his auntie.

After fixing myself, he went out and his sister told him that their cousins might be sleeping at their place and I can't stay there, of course. I just told him that I'll just be going home. Of course he was shy with the situation because he was caught off guarded and he doesn't know anything about it. And of course, I was also caught off guarded that's why I choose the best thing to do -- run away with a blank face. Like what I told you awhile ago, I was still in a state of shock by then. I don't know what I should feel for the travel to their place almost took us two hours! We even went to Quiapo awhile ago that's why I was dead tired and if I'll be going home, it's like I'm killing my body for the ride and all. ARGGGGHHH.

BUT.. as if I have a choice? I told him I'm not angry. The usual -- I don't want to be angry or to be pissed because I won't be getting what I want even though I'll be angry or whatsoever. I just remained calm. I dunno. I really have this attitude sometimes that I don't want to show him my feelings. Maybe because I already show him before my weaknesses that's why I'm trying to be strong. Hah!

So... I pretended that I am okay and that everything that is happening is fine with me. [sarcastic]It's okay for me to go home even though I'm dead tired and sleepy by that time already. It's okay that I tired myself to go there and just go home after an hour or so. It's really okay. [/sarcastic] In fairness to him, he kept on asking me, "How can I make it up to you?" He was even telling me suggestions like, "I'll be going to your place next week!" But that's Holy Week already and we planned that we won't be seeing each other for they will be spending the holiday to his auntie's place and they will be returning to their place by Sunday. Hassle right? He told me that he'll just go home early so that we can be together. But then, I don't wanna be a wall to their holidays together. If that's their plan, so be it. I don't want his sisters to think that his life is revolving on me that I might be bad influence to their brother. Talk about image. Hah!

I also told him that I don't have money by that time because our salary will be out by next Monday and not before weekends. He told me he'll borrow money. Hah! I don't want him to. I don't want to create hassle to him. I don't know if I'm shy or.. I really don't want him to suffer to anything that is relating to me.

So, until I came home, I pretended everything is fine until I'll be fine.

Anyway, we talked already awhile ago. Our relationship is back on smooth sailing because he was so sweet once we talked. He was telling me that he can smell me at his room as if I'm just there. He was even joking that he'll just imagine the pillow besides him to be me but once he hugged it, he can't help it anymore. He really can't feel it because there's no boobs. Hahahaha! NAUGHTY!

Oh well, hopes everything will fall to its right place already. Yeah, weekends suck if I'm not with him but I'll just be thinking that there's so many weekends that we can share together anyway. :)